DOING THE FUNK....

I never quite understood why people felt like they needed to post that they are taking a break from the blogging world...... Until this week.....

Honestly, I am not sure how to get out of this funk.... I have tried to keep my rose colored glasses on for me as well as be positive for others..... "Things will speed up" and "I feel that soon OH SO VERY SOON we will get our referrals". I have touted to others not to pay attention to the rumors.... Advise I have not taken for myself. I have been obsessed with Tate and all Tate related stuff.

I love being part of your lives and the blogging community, but I need to just forget about things for a few weeks and work on ME... I cannot be a positive support to others. I have nothing more to give in that area. So instead I will get back in touch with who I am... I will take walks with Mesa, read non-adoption/Asian related books, cook something difficult and gourmet and time consuming..... Entertain people who will not ask me about the adoption... and just live my life sans the adoption...... It doesn't mean that I love and care for y'all less.... I will be back and after a few weeks catch up on your lives. Just need this for ME.....

I am still hoping that my funk is temporary and that referrals really will speed up.......

Ciao for a few weeks.....

BOOKS....

Amazon is making a ton of money off of me right now!!!! I pre-ordered this book last January with two other Chinese influenced books.... Today the mail person came a knocking and left me these great reads!!!

Every Year On Your Birthday is written by Rose Lewis the same author who wrote I Love You Like Crazy Cakes. The new book is cute and I really like it, It just is not as cute and touching as Crazy Cakes is..... Still a great addition to a child's library.


Every night I plan on reading one of these Chinese Children stories before I go to sleep..... It just may help me dream of Tate. The illustrations in Chinese Children's Favorite Stories are great! Hmmmmmmm, which story should I read tonight?


Some of my other recent buys were adoption related or Children Health Issues...

The Baby Book and I Love You Rituals

Both books I highly recommend..... Also I have bought other children's books to add to the ever expanding library for Tate.

A GREAT READ....

How cool is this???

The Governor of the State of Utah, Jon Huntsman Jr. and his wife Mary Kaye have adopted Internationally not once but twice. Besides their (5) biological children, they adopted a daughter from China and now a daughter from India. Today our local newspaper, Salt Lake Tribune, talked about this. What makes this a good read is the way the Huntsman's handles the issues of International adoption in the public eye as well as install a pride in their birth countries. I wonder sometimes how I will balance the issues of abandonment while nurturing Tate's self esteem. I want Tate to appreciate the blessings of being adopted and having a life out of an orphanage, yet I do not want her to feel "less than" because she was not able to live in China with her biological family.

Unknowingly, Governor Huntsman played a major role in my decision to adopt Tate.

Summer of 2005 I was trying to decide if I would adopt and how I would finance this HUGE expensive of IA. I was trying to make a decision (prayer) to go ahead with this adoption and financing the first portion by cashing in a 401K...... The next day, I was starving and heading over to Wendy's for lunch and the dollar menu specials. As I was driving along the city streets of Salt Lake, I see a 2 for $1.00 taco cart. BINGO, there was my dollar menu lunch!!! At the taco stand, I see a group of 5 men and in the center was Governor Jon Huntsman. Why was this billionaire and Utah governor eating at a $1.00 taco stand??? As I headed back to my car, these men also were heading for their cars. Across the parking lane from my car Jon Huntsman was parked. All of a sudden, I see him making a beeline for ME!!! As he outstretched his hand to shake my greasy hand, he says "I just wanted to meet you". I looked into his eyes and said, " I am adopting a baby girl from China". I tell you, he had a look of puzzlement. He totally expected something political from my lips, but was surprised by my remark. A huge grin erupted from his face and he shared with me his experience of adopting Gracie Mei and said that next to marrying his wife, this was the most amazing thing he has ever experienced. He said that when they received their referral picture of Gracie, the looked at that face and knew that this was their daughter. Even though he is rich and "well connected" he also had to wait the required time that all of us do...... Kind of a comfort to know that in the eyes of China we all are equals. RICH or POOR. This was the turning point that made me decided to cash in the 401K and go blindly forward with faith into this IA world.....

Another article worth reading is this on transracial adoption.

MONTHLY SUPPORT...

I am not sure if others remember how I was whining (I never whine, really) about not having a waiting families group. Just as quickly as those word were uttered from my mouth, and SHAZAMMM..... I have two wonderful groups that have formed. Last night was our SWAC (Single Women Adopt China) group with three gorgeous jewels of China..... Here is the latest of the pictures.....
The stairs were the toy dejour at the PARTEE... Eliza was fascinated by them and could not help herself from climbing this toy most of the night. What a difference a month makes on the strides she is making in her toddler hood.


Just look at that look of shear delight as she rounds the corner and is surprised by Leanne. Take a look at that little drool coming off of the lower lip....

This is Liza (Elizabeth)..... Just looking at this picture I can tell how much she has grown and matured in the last 9 months of our meetings. Marque (below) is Liza's momma and has given Liza her old digital camera. Besides helping with the babies, Liza was mesmerized by her new toy and took tons of pictures.... I can only imagine the unflattering snaps of me.

Marque has her hands full with two Chinese gals..... the little one is Charlee, daughter of Yvette and the most recent Jewel to add to our crown. It seems comforting to say that I am next.... Tate will be the next to be loved by this group.....

This is Charlee. She exudes beauty and sweetness. She is so very tiny and just seeing her toddle around just blows my mind. Every inch of her is so very feminine.

Eliza and Charlee are one day apart..... these two little gals have play dates together. Somehow because of their young age, the play dates are mostly hanging out and playing separately. If I could look into the future, I can just see these two cuties hanging out at these gatherings as buds.

SURPRISE!!!!

Look what the mail person brought to me today!!!! Great saying, and a place for me to place snapshots for favorite pictures. Return address was mine. Postmark from North Conway New Hampshire....... Hmmmmmm!?

Who ever you are.... Thank you for the much needed pick me up!!!!

DID I SAY....

Gun to meet Mickey?????

Holy CRAP!!!!

Ooopppps...... GUM to meet Mickey!!! Fresh breath to meet the "Man"!!!

DISNEY SURVIVAL KIT

How cute is this little Tinkerbell bag? Michelle and sister Lisa, also a momma to a Chinese daughter, made these cute little survival kits.



Inside the kits were items needed for a Disney visit.... Crystal Lite mini packets for hydration, chap stix, gun to meet Mickey, Tissue for wiping eyes cause of laughing so hard from having so much fun. Passport holder to keep all our ticket needs in one place.... also decorated in Disney stuff, Wet Ones for Disney's little messes, Granola bars for energy, and a Ladybug magnet for a touch of good luck for small crowds and short lines while in Disney.

Michelle was not able to meet up with us on Friday for dinner but did a dropped by to just to say hi and give us our bags...... I just totally loved Michelle and will be hoping that she and Joe will come out to Utah for a visit.

MAD MOMMA HATTERS

Being the SHY gal that I am with wash and wear hat hair, I had a blast with the hats...... I have a crooked smile because under that righ lower lip lives a cankor sore..... OUCH!!!

Who the heck is this character? I know it is from Monsters Inc......

Under that hat lies another CHEESY grin from me..... I guess two smiles are better than one.

Even Disney is in touch with their REGGAE side.....

I think this is such a fun picture of Michelle!!!! I'm thinking she needs to get one of these on her next trip to Disney.... Lucky Michelle who has a year long membership to Disneyland and Adventure Parks....
This is Kim from San Diego.... she is blog-free, but will get one going so very soon..... This little momma was very quiet ( I think she just didn't have the chance with the rest of us chatterboxes) but boy would she ride the scary rides.... FEARLESS!!! Just the trait need to survive this International Adoption roller coaster.....Oh wow, I kind of did a little poetic comparison in IA and the Matterhorn!!!

POSING IN POOH CORNER........

All ears for Donna, Hannah and me...... Hannah is going to be a new big sister!!! What a trooper she was to hang with the ladies..... I am sure our conversation bored her to tears but she made up for the boredom with riding ALL THE SCARY RIDES and some more than once!!! Got to love a kid!!!

DASHING TO DISNEY

I'm off bright and early tomorrow morning to hop on a plane and meet up with the Disney Mommas!!! It will be fun to spend time with others in this big waiting game....

Thanks to Donna for organizing this fun time at the happiest place on earth!!!!

Just think Donna, next time we go to Disneyland, we will be towing along Tate and Lauren!!! Makes me just want to giggle with joy!!!

WHO LOVES BABY BOOK

I have started Tate's package to send her after I see her sweet face. My Secret Pal and friend, Kim, sent me this WHO LOVES BABY book.

The first page will be me..... MOMMA.


Then I will have NANA and MOMMA.... since we will be the two she will first "MEET". Then GRAMPS and NANA. I have a feeling that GRAMPS will be one of Tate's favorite people since every KIDDO always just loves GRAMPS. If Gramps was not such a pain to travel with, I would have insisted on having him come along as well..... But sadly too many frustrating trips to Norway, London, Paris and the USA have made me decide to leave him home to "prepare" for the arrival of Tate. I am sure he will be stocking the fridge with stuff as well as too much treats for when we arrive home.

On this picture I was torn. I wanted Tate and the Nannies to have a full shot to see how large Mesa was. I thought if I included just a face shot of Mesa, Tate might be too scared of either the picture or once we get her home, overwhelmed by this snuggle pup.

Here is my brother and sister (in law). They will be a significant part of Tate's life as they have been asked to be her guardians. In all this world, I could never find better parents and I just happen to be the lucky one to have such a brother and sister (in-law). I put the in-law in ( ) because she truly is a sister to me.

And finally are my nieces and nephews..... the parents are above. As I look at these faces, I have tender feeling for each one. I can only image Tate sitting in that space in the middle of the kids.
Each and everyone one of these kids are just plan amazing. From l to r is Twinkle Toes (just turned 8), Smiley (14), Awesome (18) and Sparkle (almost 12).

I have talked the most about Twinkle Toes. She is a little mini-me (0r so I have been told) and spends a lot more time with me cause she is the youngest and is not as involved as the older kiddos. I have talked a little about Smiley and Sparkle but have never talked about Awesome. He truly is Awesome and deserves more recognition than just his name but will be done in another post in the future.

All I need to do now is figure out the Chinese characters for Momma. Nana. Gramps. Dog. Uncle and Aunt. Cousins. I also need to figure out how to print it out in clear sticky paper to add to the pictures. Once done, into the care package it will go.

BEING POSITIVE...

Each morning this little guy comes out to play. Always giving me hope and joy and realization that each passing play day to this guy is another closer to my GAL!!!

ONE MORE MONTH.....

LID

FEELING BLEAK AND DOWN ABOUT THIS NUMBER and this MONTH of referrals.....

PUPPET THEATRE and LADY BUGS

It is kind of sad when an eight year old girl wants to give up her dolls and a dollhouse and puppet theatre for teen stuff. Although I think it is sad that she wants to grow up so very fast, I am happy that she thinks of Tate for her throw offs.

This puppet theatre came without puppets, and thanks to IKEA, Tate has started her sets of puppets. I bought recently at a trip to Houston (IKEA is not here in SLC until May 23), the two sets of puppets. One set shown is the Aquatic puppets and the other set is of Zoo animals.

In the center of all this fun, is a princess/ballet dancer puppet or what I think Tate will think will represent her. I have looked tons of places for a non-blond princess but the closest I have seen is more of a curly-haired brown girl .... Not too Asian looking. The other day, I happen on this one.... and within seconds, she became a central part of Tate's puppet theatre. I plan on buying a puppet that will represent me as the Queens and will add a crown to this ballet dancer to make a princess. Fun for play and perhaps later a great instrument for dialogue between a momma and Tate.

LADY BUG ....

Last year I bought from the gift shop in the lobby of the hospital I work in, these little ladybug galoshes to fit a three year old...... At the time they did not have a size 3T lady bug rain coat and put me on a list to call when they received more in. This request was last year!!!! It shocked me the other day while at work, I received a call from the gift shop telling me that they have a 3T raincoat now in stock and asked if I wanted it??!! Wanted it???? You bet and within minute's I, ummmm, I mean Tate now has this adorable lady bug rain coat.

And to top this cuteness off, here is the wooden, hand painted hanger that the rain coat was on!!! Because I technically live in a desert, I will be moving to Portland or Seattle so Tate can wear this darling of an indulgence.

ANXIOUS

I have been just a bit anxious this past week..... I am not sure what it is. Maybe it is the thought of the unknown anticipated referrals? Whatever it is, it is driving ME crazy, and I am sure ANYONE who is around me crazy. I am so flighty in my action and thoughts. I cannot keep on subject on any conversation and have total words blank from my mind. Case in point. The other day I am starving. So I pop something into the microwave. The phones rings and I start talking, nonesense I am sure, still have that starving pang and snack instead. Next day I am starving (again) got to the microwave to heat up something and discover what I had left in the microwave from yesterday's starving episode. So I am having major memory and food issues.....

Have I share with you the worries I have with what to feed Tate??? How often? How much? Nutrition?? What babies cannot eat? Formula after 12 months? Bottle vs sippy cup. I just bought this book......

Yesterday I was perusing blogs and came across this one. The posting was about the stork flying and landing on Monday or Tuesday. I kid you not, my heart started pounding out of my chest, I literally lost my breath. I am so very anxious about this cause I feel magic is in the air and I really feel that I am running out of time to get ready for Tate.





I have been obsessing about getting organized and ready for Tate. I only need to get two more pictures for the "Who Loves Baby" book to send to Tate in her care package. I need to get to my brother's house and take of him and my sister-in-law and another of their kiddos. These are the people that Tate will be meeting and hanging with all her life. Just the little Chinese character names and it will be done. I have also decided what to send the nannies and what blanket and bear I will send. I plan on getting my questions for the director/foster parents all ready set aside.

I will say that I have been drinking a lot of java today. Had a friend take me to St*rbucks today for my birthday. On my VENTI cup was this thing written called "The Way I See It #203". I think it is thoughts that customer submit and are place on the cups... Normally I would not have even looked, today for some reason I did.

"I wish couples who desperately take every means to conceive a child would realize that adoption is a wonderful alternative. A child who becomes your child through adoption completes a family. Just as when you commit to your spouse or partner there are no biological ties yet a family was formed. This child enters a family the same way! It is not blood and flesh that forms a family, but the heart."

I think that for some reason finding this is timely.

On a funny note, when I was buying that pink polka-dot bikini the other day I mentioned to the sales lady that "Gymboree is like crack to mommas". She looked at me and said "and for grandmas, too". Poor Poor Tate. Not only will she have to deal with me as a Caucasian mom, but people will think I am her Grandma!!!!

Heaven save us!!!

For all the waiting families who will be expecting this time around.... Congrats!!! I cannot wait to see and the amazingly beautiful babies and take joy in the making of a new family unit.....